Posts

Showing posts from September, 2015

14 Years & the Emotional Scars

For those of you that know me, you  know what I have tattooed on my right forearm. My get thru that, get thru anything tattoo- Washington D.C. September 11th, 2001. No doubt most of you have heard my story. But for those of you too shy to ask- here's the story by way of my journal entries from that day. Ask me to tell you about it sometime- the journal only says so much. I am posting these, I pretty much always do on 9-11. However- I will be on a self (and Monique imposed) social media, television, radio lock down as this year my PTSD is rougher then it has been in years... Here you go... Walk in my shoes...

On September 11th, 2001 I was to fly home to Michigan for a month long visit. My then husband was going to Marine Corps training at Bridgeport, in California for one month. That morning, before the sun even rose to reveal a day soon to be shrouded in horror… I didn't want to get onto the plane. I'd never before not want to get on an airplane as bad as I did that morning…

Rusty Hinges

Image
I feel like I have rust in the hinges… When it comes to focusing long enough to wrIte a blog, I feel like the Tin Man from the “Wizard of Oz” before Dorothy finally found the oil can. I want to scream from the inside- “Dammit Bitch! It’s over there! Do it already!!!” My brain in constantly boiling with shit I should be doing: the to do list that mentally never ends. Of course it’s satisfying to scratch off one or two items- then that little voice in your brain adds six or seven more items to the bottom of the page… ARGH!!!
Like for instance- right now- in this moment: I am serenely calm knowing today is my 8th wedding anniversary to Hubby- my true love. To spare everyone of the mushie-mushie stuffs- I love him. I love him more than I could ever hope to describe with my rusty as hell writer skills. We’ve been thru us and downs but almost everyone morning I get to wake up next to him- sometimes groaning he’s hit the snooze alarm six times and it keeps chirping at us from his nightstand…